I've Never Been Molested By A Stranger Before...

... Yet I have had one shove his fingers into my mouth ...

And no, he wasn't my dentist, and he wasn't wearing surgical gloves.

There I was, innocently surveying the array of contact lens solutions on the shelf of Guardian and cunningly calculating, among all the 2 in 1's and special offers, which one would cost me the least.

Not an easy task for a Human Science student, I tell you.

Suddenly, I felt an arm grip my shoulder roughly. Really roughly.

In that split second, the thought that ran through my mind was Damn! I've been caught by the guard outside campus on a weekday, wearing jeans! Hello, RM 50 fine, goodbye contact lens solution!

In the next second, the man's other hand found its way into my mouth and gripped tightly on my jaw... so as to stabilise himself and keep him from crashing to the ground, I realised. I spluttered, tried to wrench myself free, then whirled around to face the man whose fingers were leaving an aftertaste in my mouth.

He had apparently tripped over something and grabbed hold of the most convenient thing nearby to keep him from falling ...

... my mouth and shoulder.

Totally grossed out, I ran out of Guardian, headed to the closest toilet, and cleaned out my mouth as best I could. Ew, ew, ew.

When I left the toilet again, who do you think was the first person I saw? Yep, it was The Man Who Had Violated My Mouth. The front part of his shirt was lifted up, and he was scratching his bare stomach with the same fingers that had, not more than ten minutes ago, been groping my tongue.

Oh my God.

... And another grabbed hold of my shoulders from behind, causing me to fall backwards and hit my head on the ice...

There I was in Sunway Pyramid, innocently ice-skating with Awi, Aisya and Aida while the agonised, high-pitched shrieks of the duo from t.A.T.u filled my ears and kept my adrenaline pumping.

I had, of course, fallen many times already, and even brought strangers whom I had accidentally crashed into down with me. But my most fatal injuries so far were legs that were sopping wet from all the melted ice, a blister on my ankle, and possibly bruised knees.

A complete stranger made the impromptu decision to give me another injury. A more painful one. As I was not-so-innocently skating away (I had just grabbed hold of a little girl to stabilise myself -- neither of us fell, but I doubt she enjoyed being grabbed and hugged from behind by someone she didn't know), two hands gripped my long-suffering shoulders and jerked me backwards.

The world flew before my eyes as I landed onto the hard, wet, freezing ice, butt first, elbows second, and lastly the back of my head, with a painful thud of finality. Completely dazed, I stuttered out an apology to the man who had grabbed hold of me.

See? My head injuries must have been really bad to have had rendered me temporarily insane and apologising to the man who had caused my most painful fall yet.

Tears of pain ran down my eyes as the man grunted, helped himself up, and skated off without a word or even offer to help me up. The back of my head throbbed hard, my elbows were badly bruised, and there was no way I would be able to get up on my own.

Luckily, almost out of nowhere, Aisya, Awi and Aida appeared in the crowd, skating towards me furiously to help me out. They had witnessed everything, and they helped me hobble out of the rink.

Twenty minutes later, I was back on the rink and skating happily.

... But the worst was when one drooled on my shoulder on the bus ride home.

Okay, I'm exaggerating. He didn't drool. But he wouldn't stop leaning on my traumatised shoulder throughout the one-hour-journey on the ironically named RapidKL bus.

There I was, innocently sitting at the window seat, Athlete crooning in my ears to help me survive the journey that, by car or taxi, would have probably taken 15 minutes, when an extremely obese young man entered the bus and took the empty seat beside me.

I was faintly annoyed, because that would mean difficulties once I had to get out of my seat. But, oh well, public transportation meant you had to tolerate the public.

Until the public starts falling asleep and leaning heavily on you, that is.

I shifted in my seat and threw him an exasperated glance. His eyes were closed, and my loud 'ahems!' and fake coughs went by unnoticed, thanks to the earphones in his ears. He would lean on me, then sort of jerk back to his upright position, still sleeping. Then, about four seconds later, his vast body slumped and he would end up leaning on me again. The whole process would repeat over and over again no matter how hard I tried to shrink my body smaller, or press myself against the window.

I gritted my teeth. No amount of Athlete could keep my mind off this huge disturbance, so I switched my MP3 player off. Only then did I realise, over the roar of the bus engine, that a bunch of high school kids kept laughing their heads off each time the stranger leaned on me in his sleep.

How. Humiliating.